If you’ve hired a nanny or are considering hiring a nanny, you may be asking yourself, “how can I trust my nanny?”

Of course, you want to trust them. But the question lingers, “can I trust them?” After all, what could be more important than having trust in the person you leave your child or newborn baby with?

All parents want to feel that the person they have hired to care for their children can be trusted. Trusted to use good judgment; trusted to be oh-so careful; trusted to be reliable; trusted to be focused; trusted to be honest; trusted to put the welfare of the child above everything else. How do you get to that point? It’s a process to be sure.

Establishing a Good Foundation for Trust

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If you think you can be productive at work second-guessing the person you left your infant with, think again. Parents, you need to do your due diligence. If you are not engaging a reputable agency to help with the hiring process, there are minefields to be sure.

A few important tips for any family looking to hire a nanny:

1. It is critical that you talk to her references. Preferably multiple ones.
2. Be aware that her old references/former employer families may have an ongoing relationship with her. These families may be judging you to determine if they think YOU will be a good employer!
3. Make sure to have more than one meeting before offering her the job.

Getting to Trust Once She Starts with Your Family

If a nanny has a long history of childcare experience and great references, she often assumes that her new employer should trust her. Trust ME, this is where the disconnect begins.

The issue is that her new employer doesn’t know this nanny or her references, so they are forced to take what seems like a huge leap of faith. Many times nannies are completely offended by new parents’ lack of trust. Why doesn’t she trust me? I’ve been doing this job for 20 years?

Here’s what I have had to explain to our offended nannies:

• This new mom has no personal history with you.
• She doesn’t know all those children you’ve help raise.
• She needs to have her experiences with you first hand.
• She needs to see you calm her screaming baby.
• She needs to see her baby’s face light up every morning when you walk in the room.

In the very beginning, there is none of the above context or resulting comfort. Parents, by doing your due diligence and making a thoughtful choice, in time that a new relationship will be forged trust will evolve.